PRIDE.
- whatshesaid2020
- Sep 3, 2021
- 3 min read
Today is my son's 43rd birthday! He was my preemie Labor Day baby. The one that taught me how to be a mother, who challenged me to grow, and the one who loves me unconditionally. He started out small, but he has grown into a mighty man as a husband, father, and Physician's Assistant (P.A.), hence the white coat in the photo from the University of Wisconsin Madison P.A. program.
His chosen profession has always been in emergency rooms for the past four years. He is trauma-certified and a healthcare hero who worked through the pandemic day and night in layers of PPEs. The first time I saw him suited up in full gear was the day I realized the magnitude of Covid 19 and what fear could be. I'm a believer in Faith Over Fear, so this momma prayed harder than she has ever done before.
He is my HERO!
I don't usually blog about my family, but this mother's pride has welled up and is bursting out this week. He is my son, my confidant, my supporter, and my friend. Can you say that about your adult children? That transition from childhood to adulthood relationships is hard, but it can be done.
Matthew has his father's snarky humor and sarcastic nature. I'm sure its what helps him survive in crisis situations. He is compassionate and kind to those who need it the most. I'm hoping that came from me. He doesn't know a stranger and will put you at ease right away when you meet him. He is diplomatic, hard working, and fun loving. He is a great son, father and husband.
He is my HERO!
Kevin Eikenberry of Leadership & Learning understands my maternal feelings for my son as well as pride in the workplace (https://blog.kevineikenberry.com/leadership-supervisory-skills/role-pride-effective-leadership)
Outwardly Focused Pride
Outwardly focused pride is pride that exists from the satisfaction and delight that comes from the accomplishments of others and of the team. On a personal level, this is the pride we feel when our children take a first step, graduate from high school, or say "I do". In those moments, we feel good about ourselves, and the role we may have played in supporting those achievements, but it isn’t really about us. The most effective leaders have this outwardly focused pride; they feel it, and more importantly, they communicate it.
Ask yourself:
1) How do you feel when a team member achieves something they haven’t before, when they meet a target, or solve a problem?
2) If you aren’t feeling pride, check your intentions and your focus. If you are feeling it, are you sharing that feeling with others?
Inwardly Focused Pride
Is there a place for us as leaders to be proud of what we have accomplished, of our skills and achievements? Of course there is!
When we have a deep satisfaction in our abilities, it supports our self-image and increases our confidence. If you want to lead successfully, confidence and a healthy self-image are required. This inwardly focused pride though has a dark side.
You’ve heard the warnings about too much of a good thing? That warning is perfectly placed here. Too much inwardly focused pride leads to arrogance, hubris and egotism – certainly something many leaders have been accused of. The further complicating factor here is that the amount of this inwardly focused pride, and its intentions are ultimately judged by others – those you are leading. Your level of personal pride and satisfaction could be healthy, but not seen as such by your team. This makes self-awareness and the ability to observe others and how they respond to you exceedingly important.
So the next time you have someone who needs celebrated - CELEBRATE - especially in front of family members or your work team. Its a simple gesture of a private kind word, a public thank you, or a personal note that makes all the difference between their self-confidence and your relationship building. Find out how people like to be celebrated (publicly or privately) and do it. I guarantee you not only will their pride well up, but yours as well for being the catalyst that evoked that emotion.
What She Said ~ Beverly
Happy Birthday!